Friday, April 10, 2009

Happy Birthday To Me; I Waxed!

In Sin City there lives a beautiful, smart, and divorced woman who is also a mother to a 14-year old boy-man child. Kelly, a sassy and savvy working gal, after a long separation and drawn out divorce, is looking for her very own “Mr. Big”; unfortunately while looking for her very own “Mr. Big” Kelly has found a “Mr. Small”, a Mr. Commitment Phobic, and ummm…well read on.

Not one the follow the “Rules”, Kelly does not desire to be rescued by a man, thus I assume she owns both a gun and vibrator; and I’m guessing she knows how to use both with expert accuracy. Kelly can take care of herself, and like many of us, she is looking to connect with someone to share life moments with. And if Kelly and the rest of us are lucky, some really good sex will be part of the total package. Let's be honest ladies, at some point in our lives, good sex is up there on the list of “Must Haves” when embarking upon a new relationship.

Recently, Kelly began to date a successful, good looking, and well-mannered man whom she thought had potential to be her very own “Mr. Big” This guy did all the right things…good conversation, he showed real interest, provided some romance, brought flowers on a few occasions, and with gentle ease took the lead in few fabulous and heavy make out sessions; not too pushy, but urgent enough to make Kelly want just a bit more…Well one night, after a really nice dinner, and a heavy make out session, Kelly's date whispers ever so softly in her ear…”It’s my birthday, and I had my back waxed just for you.”

Yes, because it was HIS BIRTHDAY! “Mr. Harry-Back" had himself waxed just for Kelly. Yum Yum...ladies, doesn't that just put you in the mood? What does one say to that kind of "confession"; "Oh! baby that is so hot..let me see...did it hurt much, let me rip those cloths off right now; I can't wait to see and feel your bare back!" Really?...How does one respond to this spin on, "I'm Bringin Sexy Back".

I don’t know the details of how Kelly let “Mr. Harry-Back” down, but she somehow managed a graceful exit without having to find out if he really did “wax his back” just for her.

Kelly is still single in Sin City and, still looking for her very own “Mr. Big”. She’ll find him…he’s out there…he will come along when she least expects it. In the meantime, I think Kelly should carry not only a lady Smith&Wesson in her handbag, but a waxing kit...just in case.

3 comments:

  1. Ewwwwww.....that is just wrong on so many levels! Where did you find that picture. I think I just threw up in my mouth!

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  2. Ahhh, I hope you didn't throw up but instead got a small giggle. I hijacked the pic from one of my FB friends; I think he posted it as a joke; but I have no actual knowledge so I can't be sure.

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  3. That is one disturbing picture!!!!

    JC

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